Taking Chances Read online

  Taking Chances

  A WeHo Story

  Sherryl D. Hancock

  Copyright © Sherryl D. Hancock 2019

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise without prior written permission from the publisher.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any person or persons, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Published by Vulpine Press in the United Kingdom in 2019

  ISBN: 978-1-83919-015-5

  Cover by Claire Wood

  Cover photo credit: Tirzah D. Hancock

  www.vulpine-press.com

  Also in the WeHo series:

  When Love Wins

  When Angels Fall

  Break in the Storm

  Turning Tables

  Marking Time

  Jet Blue

  Water Under the Bridge

  Vendetta

  Gray Skies

  Everything to Everyone

  Lightning Strykes

  In Plain Sight

  Quid Pro Qup

  For the Telling

  Between Heaven and Hell

  Chapter 1

  “Alright, Palani,” Kana said, her tone stern on the smaller woman’s first name. “What can I do for you?”

  They were standing in the parking garage adjacent to the San Diego Police Department. Kana had met Palani Ryker the day before, when she and her partner in homicide had questioned Mrs. Ryker about a murder. Now, Palani had turned up, lingering near Kana’s Lincoln Navigator. Kana had been quite shocked to see the beautiful woman seemingly stalking her, and it showed in her reactions.

  Palani smiled inexplicably, biting her bottom lip. Kana was dumbfounded.

  “What?” Kana asked in spite of herself.

  “It’s the first time you’ve said my first name,” Palani said, sounding awed.

  “And?” Kana was still bewildered at the young woman’s obvious exaltation.

  “And you pronounced it right, with the emphasis on the last syllable. Most people get it wrong the first time,” Palani explained, still smiling like a kid at Christmas.

  Kana shook her head, then glanced at her watch. “First of all, Mrs. Ryker, you told me your name yesterday, pronouncing it, assumedly, correctly. Secondly, had I not been paying attention then, I also had seventeen years on Oahu to learn how to pronounce Hawaiian names properly.”

  Palani didn’t seem daunted by Kana’s tone in the slightest. Her eyes still sparkled with excitement, even as she purposefully wiped the grin off her lips.

  “What is it you want, Mrs. Ryker?” Kana asked. It was not the first time that morning, and she was getting agitated.

  “Are you in a hurry?”

  “Rather,” Kana replied, blinking twice. Is she ever going to get to her point?

  Palani hesitated, not wanting to irritate Kana but wanting to talk to her all the same.

  Kana looked back at her for a long moment, then sighed. “Get in,” she said, unlocking the passenger door with the remote.

  Palani smiled and walked around to the passenger side of the Navigator. Kana got in on the driver’s side and started the vehicle up with a rumble. Palani looked around curiously. The interior of the Navigator was black leather, and it smelled good. She noticed the beaded crystals that hung on the rear-view mirror. It was a combination of carnelian and black onyx, the crystals for passion and inner calm. Both hung on silver rope chains that intertwined.

  Kana nodded at the officer at the gate to the parking garage as she drove by him, putting on her sunglasses and pulling onto the road. This was an unexpected turn of events, and it was throwing a normally unperturbable Kana off a bit.

  “So what is it you want?” she asked.

  “To talk to you.”

  “Is it something else you remembered about the case?” Kana prompted, desperate for that to be the case.

  “Well… no. I told you and your partner, Officer Ako, everything I knew yesterday.”

  “Then I’m not sure what we’re doing here.”

  “Well… I just…” Palani grimaced, suddenly feeling foolish.

  She’d had a hunch about Sergeant Kana Sorbinno of San Diego PD Homicide Division, but now she wasn’t so sure. But it was too late to turn back. “I just wanted to talk to you… in a less official capacity,” she added in a rush when she saw Kana’s dark eyes narrow.

  “So talk,” Kana said, her tone all cop, throwing an unconcerned shrug.

  Palani looked back at her, biting her lip. Kana Sorbinno was a lot more intimidating than she’d really realized. What if Kana told her she was crazy? What if she laughed in her face? Was this even a good idea? What if she was wrong? All these questions swirled in her head as she tried to think of something to say.

  Palani had worked with another model named Jerry Castle a number of times, and they’d become close friends. It was well known in the modeling community that Jerry was a lesbian. In getting to know her, Palani had realized that despite not understanding the gay community at all, she liked the other woman a great deal. It had been Jerry that had made Palani aware that something really was missing in her life. Palani had achieved her lifelong goal of becoming a model, and that should have made her happy, but it didn’t. Jerry, who was deeply in love with her girlfriend, would frequently talk about the times she and Jane Anne would lie in bed and talk for hours. About the silly things they’d do to make each other laugh. How she couldn’t wait to get done with the shoot they were working on so she could go home to her “baby.”

  Palani realized she’d never had that, and that she wanted it desperately. Looking back, she’d realized that even the men she’d dated before had never made her feel like Jerry said she felt when she was with Jane Anne. So Palani decided she needed to work at it. So she’d set to work trying to achieve that with Matthew, who she’d married two years before.

  Matthew Ryker was her manager. He’d been there for her since the day she’d walked into his office and told him she wanted to be a model. He was a very mild man, quiet, unassuming, but when he did his job, he did it well. When he’d asked Palani to marry him, she’d been so grateful for all his support she accepted, never considering the fact that he wasn’t someone she was deeply in love with. The last two years had been quiet and stable, just like Matthew.

  Palani quickly found out that Matthew didn’t respond well to change. She tried to do romantic little things for him, to which he simply didn’t know how to respond. She tried to lie in bed and talk to him one morning after he’d haphazardly made love to her. As usual, she’d been left unsatisfied; it was something she figured was a problem with her. She knew she was able to achieve an orgasm—she’d given herself enough of them alone—but Matthew had no talent in that area. The discussion had been about something she’d thought he’d be interested in, the latest Fendi line. Matthew had grown impatient with her rather quickly and had gotten out of bed. She’d tried a few other times, in other situations, but Matthew never had the time to have “inane” conversations with her.

  Then it had struck her. Did Jerry have what she had with Jane Anne because they were both women? Because women were just more capable of feeling so much more deeply? She started spending time with the couple, and found that more and more she envied Jerry. Jane Anne was the classic butch type, but she was so sweet to Jerry. When Jerry would drop something, Jane Anne would lean down and pick it up. Jane Anne took charge when things were going wrong, like their reservation for a restaurant being lost or a car not arriving when it should. Palani saw that Jane Anne basically cocooned Jerry in security and love, and Palani ached for that. So her curiosity about women had started there.

  She had in a small way “investigated” the alternate lifestyle, accompanying Jerry and Jane Anne to a few gay clubs. She’d been too shy to talk to anyone, and almost afraid to respond to some of the more aggressive women that approached her. Many of them had been butch, and Palani had quickly discovered that she wasn’t attracted to that type of woman at all. Being so feminine, much like Jerry, she assumed she was supposed to be with a woman that was butch, like Jane Anne. She never discussed it with Jerry, feeling foolish for not knowing. The fact that she hadn’t been attracted to the butch women, however, made her question her own curiosity—was she wrong?

  Meeting Kana the day before, when she and her partner had come to her door to question Matthew about a famous photographer that had been murdered, had sent her curiosity into overdrive instantly. Kana had dazzled her with her dark features and proud stature, reminding Palani instantly of the goddess Pele from her homeland’s folklore. At first her attraction had been on a purely physical level, seeing Kana’s dark eyes and flowing black hair. Kana’s size—she stood at five feet ten—rather than being imposing, actually seemed comforting to her. Then Kana’s manner; she was so strong and direct. It made Palani curious about her, and somehow she’d known from the moment she met her that Kana was indeed a lesbian. She was also sure that Kana was the one she was meant to explore her curiosity with.

  As far as Palani was concerned, it had been Fate that had brought Kana Sorbinno to her door. What had been the odds of a highly attractive woman, who was also a lesbian—she thought for sure she was, anyway—walking up to her own door? When she was so curious about women anyway? To Pa
lani it was Fate’s way of saying, “Here you go, check it out.” Kana’s attitude had been a bit off-putting, as she’d been “all business” and far from awed by the petite model, which was what Palani was used to, but Palani was determined to at least try to pursue the matter with her. Sometimes even Fate needed a push.

  Kana glanced over at Palani at the next light, pointedly. Palani knew she better start talking or Kana was likely to let her out the next time they stopped.

  “I, uh,” Palani stammered. “I notice you aren’t wearing a wedding ring.”

  Kana’s lips twisted in a wry grin. “That would be because I’m not married.”

  “Why not?” Palani asked, far too quickly.

  Kana looked over at her, her eyes indicating her growing impatience with Palani’s line of questioning.

  “I mean,” Palani began, “I… just… I looked around your car, and I didn’t see…” She trailed off, not wanting to finish that thought.

  “Didn’t see what?” Kana asked, her lips curling in derision again.

  “I, um, well…”

  “Well?” Kana asked, pushing purposely.

  Palani bit her lip, actually afraid to say it now.

  Kana waiting, feeling irritated, and worse still, starting to feel like a real bitch for being mean in the face of the poor woman’s obvious discomfit.

  “Maybe a rainbow?” Kana asked finally, her tone even.

  Palani nodded, her eyes showing her sudden apprehension.

  Kana looked thoughtful for a moment. “I use my vehicle for law enforcement work. It wouldn’t be professional to have something like that on it.”

  “But you are…” Palani said, again trailing off, not wanting to make a mistake here.

  “Gay?”

  “Yes.”

  “Yes.”

  Palani nodded, chewing at the inside of her lip nervously. “Are you seeing anyone right now?”

  “I see a lot of women. Why?”

  Palani shrugged helplessly. “I was just wondering if you’d be willing to see me.”

  “You mean romantically?” Kana asked, actually sounding a bit outraged.

  “Um, yes,” Palani said, noting Kana’s tone.

  “You’re married.”

  “I know,” Palani said. “But—”

  “But what?” Kana asked sharply.

  “But I want, I mean, I think I want—”

  “Think?” Kana sounded even more outraged now.

  Palani sighed, shaking her head and looking out the window. This wasn’t going at all like she had hoped. She suddenly knew that Kana wasn’t interested, and she didn’t know what to do now. She felt like a total fool. She’d been so sure there was some kind of connection with this woman, but she could see clearly that she’d been wrong, very wrong.

  Kana looked over at Palani. It was easy to see the woman’s turmoil. She felt a pang of guilt for causing it.

  “You’re curious,” Kana said, her voice gentling a bit.

  Palani nodded, not looking at her.

  Kana sighed. “And you were hoping to find someone to satisfy that curiosity.”

  Again Palani nodded, still not looking at her.

  Kana nodded too. “Well, look, I’m sure with your looks, you won’t have any problem finding someone who would kill to show you the ropes.”

  “I don’t…” Palani began, shaking her head miserably.

  “Don’t what?” Kana asked. “You don’t think you’ll find someone to help you out? Because I assure you, you will.”

  “I don’t want just anyone.”

  “And you think you want me?” Kana asked, sounding shocked.

  “Yes.”

  Kana shook her head. “I’m sorry,” she said, “I’m just not in a place in my life where I’m willing to be a hobby to a married, albeit beautiful, woman.”

  “You think I’m beautiful?” Palani asked, her eyes widening.

  Kana gave her a deadpan look. “You trying to tell me you don’t know that you’re beautiful?”

  “I didn’t know you think I am.”

  “Jesus Christ, woman,” Kana said, shaking her head. “I do have eyes, and they work just fine,” she assured her.

  Palani smiled brilliantly then, looking innately pleased.

  Kana glanced over at her, then shook her head. The girl was too damned cute to be believed. She had no idea what to do with that.

  They arrived at Kana’s house a short time later. Palani looked over at her, a question in her eyes.

  “Come on,” Kana said, gesturing toward the house with her head.

  Kana got out, and Palani followed her up to her house. As they walked inside, Palani noted that the place was small but nicely furnished. Nothing was overly opulent or brassy. Many of the colors were either dark or neutral. The couch and chair in her living room were black leather, the tables a deep, rich maple. The carpet was a light mocha color, with a deep blue accent rug under the coffee table.

  In her kitchen, the countertop Kana tossed her keys onto was a beautiful green Corian.

  Kana headed down the hallway toward her bedroom. Much to her dismay, Palani followed her; her stern glance seemed to have no effect on the waif-like model. Sighing, she continued to stride to her room.

  Kana’s bedroom was large, the bed a sleigh in dark oak. The other pieces of furniture in the room were the same shade. The bedding was a deep plum color. There weren’t many decorations, only one framed picture hanging over the bed. It was a seascape, with dark blue and green-blue waves crashing on a rocky shore and the sun going down on the horizon.

  The bathroom in the master was an open area. Palani sat down on Kana’s bed, eliciting an eye roll from the tough homicide cop. Palani watched as Kana took two pills then opened the medicine cabinet again and pulled out eye drops.

  “What’s wrong?” Palani asked.

  “Allergies.”

  Palani sat and watched as Kana put drops into her eyes, then closed them tight.

  “Do the drops hurt?” Palani asked, noticing that Kana winced.

  “Pretty much like Tabasco sauce,” Kana said, still standing at her bathroom sink with her eyes shut.

  “Ouch,” Palani said sympathetically.

  “Uh-huh.”

  Kana opened her eyes a few moments later, blinking repeatedly. Palani watched as she blotted her eyes with a tissue, then reached for an eyeliner pencil and started reapplying her makeup.

  “If a woman isn’t butch, then what is she?” Palani asked.

  Kana glanced at her, perplexed. “Huh?”

  “I mean, if you’re a lesbian and you’re not butch, then what would it be called?”

  Kana looked at her for a long moment, grinning slightly. “I think you mean femme.”

  “Femme?”

  “Yeah, the other side of butch.”

  Palani nodded. “So you’d be femme, right?”

  Kana looked thoughtful, then shrugged as she went back to putting on her eyeliner. “I guess some might see it that way. I never really thought about it—I’m me.”

  Palani nodded. “So that’s it then.”

  “What’s what then?” Kana asked, lost again.

  “Why you’re not attracted to me at all.”

  Kana turned around, leaning against her sink. “Okay, tell me where your head just went,” she said, her face indicating her confusion at Palani’s logic.

  “Well,” Palani said, “femmes are interested in butch women, right?”

  “Uh…” Kana started to say.

  “And I’m not even sort of butch, so that’s why you’re not attracted to me,” Palani said, sounding proud of herself for figuring that out.

  Kana laughed softly, shaking her head. “What makes you think that femmes are only interested in butch women?”

  “Well, there’s got to be one that plays the man and one that plays the woman, right?”

  Kana laughed outright then, shaking her head again. “Oh, babygirl, who told you that one?”

  Palani looked back at her. Somewhere in her head she’d caught the “babygirl” and liked it, but she didn’t comment on it then. “No one, really, I just…” she said, her voice trailing off as she shrugged.

  “Okay, well, you’re wrong,” Kana said. “It’s not about being femme or butch. It’s not about whether you wear makeup, high heels, or nice clothes. It’s about whether or not you have deeper feelings for women than you do men. There is no ‘man’ in the relationship—that’s the whole point.”